Her family is in the middle of a $2,000 enuresis treatment plan, and she’s learning a lot about what to do, and what NOT to do, to help her son stay dry at night. I’ve had several parents ask about these treatment plans, but haven’t ever known anyone who gave it a try. In the long run, of course $2,000 is nothing compared to helping your child stay dry. But for many, many families, it’s just not an option.

Shelley’s sharing all she learns here: http://ourkidscanstaydry.blogspot.com/2007/12/why-are-we-here.html

Go check it out, and leave a comment!

Because 99% of children outgrow bedwetting, your child’s feelings should concern you more than the bedwetting itself. Is your child crying a lot and convinced he’ll have to give up his “big boy” pants for Huggie’s pull-ups? For every child that’s devastated by the bedwetting, there’s a child who’s totally unphased by it. The very worried child will need extra reassurance that there’s nothing wrong with them. With the carefree child, make sure they understand they should work on ending the bedwetting – but without converting them into a worrier.  Different parents have achieved different levels of “worry wart.” Some are world class heavy weights, others don’t even make the qualifying rounds.

Part of evaluating the problem is evaluating your own reaction to it. Does it keep you up at night or do you simply wash the sheets and forget about it? Has it had a minimal impact on your life or has it greatly interfered with your daily routine?  Make sure you’re taking the problem seriously, but ease up if you recognize that you’ve gone into panic mode. If the bedwetting has you massively stressed out, then you’ll need your own plan of action for handling it.  

The frequency of the bedwetting itself also deserves some attention. Some kids wet the bed nightly. Other kids may only do it a few times a month. The more frequently it occurs, the more aggressive you need to be in seeking treatment.

If your child is under the age of three, bedwetting is a particularly common problem.  

Toddlers have short little arms, tiny toes, and a teensy bladder to match! Seriously, though, at that age, a lot of children’s bladders aren’t fully developed. During the night, their body can produce too much urine for their bladder to hold. As the bladder develops, the bedwetting stops. 

Even children up to age five wet the bed occasionally, and it’s no cause for alarm.  

At this age, medication or a trip to the psychologist should be a distant thought. The scientific term for frequent bedwetting is “nocturnal enuresis.” Millions of children deal with enuresis, and only 1% of them carry the problem into adulthood.  

If your child is older than five, you’ll want to look at the problem more closely.  

Does bedwetting run in the family? If so, the problem will likely run its course and then go away. Learning what helped those family members overcome the bedwetting might help your child.  

Frequent bedwetting in older children might be a sign of a physical problem, some of which are quite serious.  

Unlike a newly potty trained two-year old, a seven or eight-year who wets the bed multiple times a week should see a doctor – not that anything’s necessarily wrong. You just want to be sure to rule out a urinary tract or bladder infection, among other pretty benign conditions. For many children, a period of bedwetting is just part of growing up. They may never outgrow leaving dirty socks on the floor, but they will outgrow enuresis.

1. When your child urinates, have them stop mid-stream. By squeezing the muscles that control the flow of urine, your child should be able to stop urinating once they’ve started.
2. Have your child do the start-stop thing three times
3. Repeat the start-stop process during each trip to the bathroom

 What you’re hoping to accomplish is this – if your child has better bladder control during the day, then they’ll have better bladder control at night, too.  Using these two exercises in conjunction is completely safe.

You probably won’t find it on one of Jane Fonda’s workout videos, but there actually is an exercise for strengthening bladders. Doctors sometimes suggest exercises that can help your child learn to better control their bladder. For some children with Enuresis, holding their urine for as long as they can before going to the bathroom helps.  

Unlike some bedwetting techniques, this exercise is meant to strengthen your child’s body – not change their mindset. It can be one of the most effective approaches because the cause of bedwetting is usually physical. With daily repetition, this “hold the pee” exercise can help your child’s body develop more control over its bladder.  

Here’s how it works:

1.    Have your child tell you every time they have to use the bathroom

2.    Have your child hold their urine for a few minutes

3.    Once they’ve held it, have them go to the bathroom 

Of course, you also want to explain to your child that this exercise will help them with their bedwetting. Otherwise, your child will probably be rather perplexed by this new potty ritual.  

Repeat this exercise daily. Little by little, increase the amount of time that your child hold their urine before they go to the bathroom.  

In no time at all, they may be doing the “I gotta pee” dance all the way to a dry night!

It’s called lifting, but no actual lifting need be involved.  

A very young child might need to be carried, but there’s no need to strain your back lifting your six-year-old out of bed. Most children wet the bed at about the same time every night. This tends to especially be true of children who follow a daily routine. If you know what time the accidents tend to occur, you can set your alarm to wake your child up before this time. I suppose you can figure this time out in one of two ways: set up a bed-side reconnaissance mission or simply experiment with different wake-up times until you’ve hit on the one that seems right. For instance, after a few days, you might realize that your child is dry before 11pm but wet after 1am. In time, you can effectively alter their nighttime “routine.” Their bodies will eventually set their own little internal alarm clocks. 

Night lifting is a free alternative to bedwetting alarms.  

The outcome of the two techniques is the same: your child’s body becomes programmed to wake up at night when their bladder is full. Enuresis alarms can cost upwards of $100, so I say give the freebie method a go before you lay out the cash.

You should see a doctor if you think your child might have an overactive bladder. The doctor will have advice for correcting the problem, and he or she can detect the possibility of any medical issues. Of course, bedwetting is very rarely caused by a serious medical condition. But, it’s always better to be safe than sorry. Plus, you don’t want that overachieving bladder of theirs to interfere with school or other activities.  

Chances are, though, your child falls into the category of kids who only wet the bed at night. You can encourage your child by pointing out that they do well making it to the bathroom during the day. Explain the logic in kiddy terms – you’re able to get to the bathroom during the day, so, in time, you’ll able to do the same at night. This can be reassuring to children who feel babyish because of their bedwetting. Older children, in particular, might fear that they’re a hair’s breadth away from being back in diapers day and night. Reminding them that they don’t have trouble during the day will assure them that their potty training didn’t somehow come undone.

They’re beating the Vegas house odds, after all!

A bleak outlook can lead to a “what’s the point?” attitude when you’re trying different techniques to help with the problem. 

If someone else in the family, like a big brother or sister, used to wet the bed, have them talk with your child. It might help to see living proof that eventually the problem really does go away.  You can sit down with your child and explain in kid-friendly terms what doctors have learned about bed wetting. Tell them that with all the kids in the world who’ve had trouble with wetting the bed, we’ve been able to learn that the problem goes away – and it doesn’t always take a long time. 

Pointing out their progress can also help your child see the light (or dry sheets?) at the end of the tunnel.  

They’ll realize that with their gradual improvements, the problem is getting smaller and smaller. Eventually, it will just disappear! When your child is feeling calmer and more self-assured, the two of you will have an easier time working on the problem.  

Check out our brand new book on bedwetting: Zumar and the Amazing Odyssey into Dry – a great book to read to your child, or for young readers to read to themselves – about causes and treatments for bedwetting. Be sure to sign up for the bedwetting help report while you’re there!

I also found that a point system works well. Each dry night counts for one point. When your child reaches a certain number of points, they get a small prize or treat.  Or, you could also use different levels of prizes. For example, three points buys a piece of candy, five points means a small toy, and ten points is a trip to a fun place, like the zoo. Knowing a double-scoop cone from Baskin Robbins is at stake might keep them from balking at the “no drinks an hour before bedtime” rule. 

If money’s a little tight, your child can earn points towards a free pass on a messy room or an extra half-hour of cartoons.  Whichever route you decide to go, the prizes will serve as a goal your child can work towards. It’ll be that little extra boost to encourage them to really try at the techniques you’ve implemented.  

Even something as simple as a weekly chart can generate excitement and motivation. Every dry night gets a gold star on the chart. Let your child put the sticker on the chart themselves. Kids are very “I have to see it to believe it,” so a visual reminder of their progress can be very effective.  

So a hearty thanks to psychologist B.F. Skinner, whose work showed the world the wonders of positive reinforcement — I’m guessing he had a bed wetter!  If you haven’t gotten your copy of the free report “Got a Bedwetter? Top 10 Mistakes to Avoid” just visit www.bedwettinghelpformoms.com and request it.